"How would you rate your health in each of these four areas- spiritual, physical,emotional,relational- from one(terrible) to ten(fantastic)?"
spiritual…i would say 5
physical i would say 3 since i do not move enough i am always seated and i sleep too much and lately i have been eating way too much you know and i feel so uneasy with my body and i know i am not super healthy and i know i need to lose some pounds…i really need to take care of my body
emotional…i am very very VERY moody…so i will say 1..i am not happy at all okay…
relational…5 just because i have been doing better lately when it comes to my relationship with people around me..i am open to meeting new people and i do not push people away like i used to but i need some work…
"Greatest challenge to improve my health in these areas…"
i need to be more open to changes, and i need to let go of my past, i need to forgive myself in order to forgive others and move on with my life…i need to heal emotionally in order to stop eating my feeling, and take better care of my body, so i can be out there meeting people…i need to love myself, i need to stop calling myself all these negatives names, and i need to keep a positive mind and attitude towards life…i need to let God in my life like He is supposed to be and bring all the great stuff he promised…"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." "
today’s challenge was about spiritual health in life…as i was walking around my community i was praying in my heart and it felt good…i meditated on my life and what needs to be there and what needs to go…where i want to be and what makes me happy…how i want to love people and how i want to be loved…i had a nice moment
i was too scared of my mom’s craziness to be with the guy i was in love with back in high school(she said she would call the police on him and have him jailed smh)…couple of years later he slept with some girl and i don’t want anyone’s leftover…
i also need to stop procrastinating so much
oh and that guy whose heart i broke…i regret the way i ended things with him…he was a good guy and we were great together i could have ended our relationship differently…i was such a bitch…i had my karma last year though
i regret the fact that i didn’t show my grandpa how much i loved him when he was alive…i didn’t know i loved him so much until he died…SHOW YOUR PEOPLE SOME LOVE OKAY…YOU NEVER KNOW WHEN THEY LEAVING THIS EARTH
"As quickly as possible, without thinking too hard and too long, make a list of five things you’d change about your life if you knew you only had a month to life. choose at least one to begin changing today, right now."
i would get out of my room and see what is awaiting me in the world.
i would take more risk
i would be less submissive and stop saying yes to everything that is asked of me
i would finish what i started, which i can never seem to commit to
i would pick up my bible and read something every day like my mom as been encouraging me to do.
at the beginning of the year i told myself that i would go back to reading like i used to back in high school where i would read like at least 3 books a week..so i got myself a library card and i have been reading at least 2 a month :) i am trying here with all the freaking homeworks i have and work…
lately i have been feeling incomplete and stuck in life and i have been asking myself what is my purpose on this planet…what was i created for…what did God want from me…then i have been meaning to manage my time wisely, make friends and what not…
as i was shelf reading in yesterday, i sad that book…
i have decided to take the challenge and see how i evolve
Her mental age is about three years old. She loves Winnie the Pooh, Beauty & the Beast, and Sesame Street. Even though the below picture is unconvincing.
Edna and “Cookie.” I think she was trying to play it cool.
My name is Jeanie. I’m Edna’s younger sister. I’m also her guardian and caregiver.
That’s me on the left. (Hey, you never know. After a year of writing a blog about online dating - Jeanie Does the Internet - I’ve come to learn that there are A LOT of fools on the internet.)
ANYWAY, I’m not “doing the internet” anymore. I’m taking care of Edna full-time, after completing my MFA in Writing for Screen & Television at USC.
May 16, 2014. I wanted a picture. Edna wanted breakfast.
In case you’re wondering where our parents are, they’re dead. Our mom died of breast cancer when she was just 33.
Us with mom before she died. (Obviously.)
As for our dad, he peaced-out around the time my mom got sick. His loss - we’re awesome.
Here we are being awesome at the beach. Pushing a wheelchair in the sand? Not so awesome.
In case you’re wondering “What’s wrong?” with my sister - as a stranger once asked me on the street - NOTHING. Yes, Edna has a rare form of epilepsy - Lennox-Gastaut syndrome - but I don’t know if that’s anymore “wrong” than people who don’t have manners.
Basically, Edna was born “normal,” and started having seizures as a baby. They eventually got so bad that they cut off the oxygen to her brain, causing her to be mentally disabled. Or impaired. Or intellectually disabled. Or whatever you want to call it - except “retarded,” because in 2010, President Obama signed Rosa’s Law into effect, replacing that word with “intellectually impaired.”
Which is cool and all, but services for the disabled and the people who care for them are SEVERELY LACKING. Also, there’s a bunch of people working in taxpayer-funded positions who are supposed to help families like us, but don’t. (Big surprise, I know.) They just fill out paperwork (whenever they feel like it) with asinine statements like this:
YUP. I transport my sister down the stairs in her wheelchair, because that is not only safe, but TOTALLY PRACTICAL. Why doesn’t everyone in a wheelchair just take the stairs, for God’s sake? Stop being so lazy, PEOPLE WITHOUT WORKING LEGS!
But, as it says above, Edna’s legs do work. Whether or not she wants them to, is another story.
Edna refusing to go inside.
These are the stairs that I have to carry her up - by myself - on a daily basis. That is, until one of my legs break and both of us are just sitting at the bottom of the stairs, helpless.
For six months, I have begged - BEGGED - the State of California to help my sister, which they are required by law - The Lanterman Act specifically - to do so. But they’ve told me “these things take time” and that I “need to amend my expectations.” (That was said to me when I refused to place Edna at AN ALL-MALE CARE FACILITY. Because yes, that was an “option” that was offered to me.)
Prior to Edna moving in with me in my one-bedroom apartment, she was living with her amazing caregiver, Gaby, back in Tucson, where we went to high school and I did my undergrad. Edna’s reppin’ the Wildcats below.
But back in November, Gaby also died from breast cancer. (FUCK YOU, BREAST CANCER!) This picture was taken a month before she died. She never even told me she was sick because she didn’t want me to worry.
By the way, we were raised by our grandma. Edna and her were very close.
She’s dead, too. Surprise.
She died when I was 20 and Edna was 21. That’s when I became Edna’s legal guardian and Gaby stepped into the picture to help me out with Edna.
So, six months ago, after Gaby died, I moved Edna to California, where I tried to get the folks over at The Frank D. Lanterman Regional Center to help me. I’ve told them I’m worried about our safety - that one of us could get hurt on the stairs - I’ve told them I can’t afford to pay the private babysitters $15/hour because the ones social services sent me who make $9/hour were unreliable (they didn’t show up on time or at all so I could get to school and work), untrustworthy (one of them let Edna go to the bathroom in the kitchen and then took her into the bathroom because “that what I thought I was supposed to do.”)
But the people over at the FLRC don’t return my calls, they don’t file the paperwork on time - and the first caseworker that was assigned to us actually LAUGHED AT my sister when he came to our home to evaluate her. When I reported him to his supervisor, she told me, “That’s just [insert name of said jackass].”
He was one of the two caseworkers that contributed to the report I mentioned above, which also included this:
So let me get this straight - I have to feed, bathe, dress and help Edna in the bathroom and you can’t deduce whether or not she is able to vote? What in the fuck?!
I’m also sad for the caregivers who are SO EXHAUSTED - trying to take care of their loved ones - while also trying to take care of themselves and battling a system that is supposed to help, but does nothing of the sort. And I know a lot of people give up. They let their dreams, their marriages, their friendships slide. All while trying not to resent the very person you’re doing it all for.
Edna wanted to sit next to me the other day while I was writing. Clearly, she’s not impressed.
Here’s the thing: I REFUSE TO GIVE UP. I’M NOT GIVING UP ON HER OR MYSELF. I’m going to pursue my dreams while taking care of her, AND while ensuring that the people paid to do their jobs ACTUALLY do them.
That’s where you come in. I need you to help me get my story out there. Because I know I’m not alone in this. I want to connect with families who are in similar situations and also show people who have no idea what it’s like to care for someone with a disability (or even a loved one who is sick) that it can be rewarding. Super fucking hard. Exhausting. Painful. Isolating. But, rewarding.
I’m going to get help for my sister - and others. My hope is that by sharing our story, I can bring awareness to the lack of services and help for the disabled.
STOP SCROLLING. THIS PERSON ISN’T ASKING FOR MONEY AND THIS POST WON’T MAKE YOU SAD.
This is a really uplifting and inspirational story of a family sticking by each other and making things work despite a whole lot of shit
They just want to find other people in the same position they are, for a sense of community and to feel like they aren’t alone.
I know out of all of you, some of you have followers who are living with and taking care of intellectually or emotionally disabled family members, and this lovely and unbreakable pair of sisters need to find them.
people:omg ew why would you do that you look like a slave how're you ever going to get a man when your hair looks nappy nobody wants a girl with peasy hair what about a job you look so unprofessional you need to do something with your hair you look like a nappy-headed ho how do you expect people to ever respect you?
black woman:*wears a weave*
people:LOL look at this ratchet bitch wearin a weave because she cant grow her own hair do you even have hair under there i mean do you even wear your real hair out at all i hate weaves its like false advertising i dont see why you'd wear fake hair when you could just have your own.
black woman:*gets a perm*
people:why do you want to be white why do you hate yourself so much to be burning your hair out with the creamy crack every 4-6 weeks and it cant even be healthy for your hair or your scalp you need to let it go and embrace who you really are i hope that in time you come to accept yourself and what God has given you.
black woman:fuck y'all, I do what I want.
black men:see this is why i dont fuck with black women they got attitude problems bruh i only like a light-skin yellowbone with good hair that knows how to act i dont understand why black women gotta be so mad all the time like damn black women really aint shit.
I seriously HATE taking people to the airport…This weekend has been extremely emotional
Seeing my family, people I have not seen in more than 6 years…grandpa’s funeral (I cried way too much) now we gotta say good bye to everyone leaving to their home…teary eyes…just took my dad to the airport…am so sad